Hi LKM and welcome. I can see that you already have a pretty good understanding of what is going on there. When you are in a relationship with someone who was in a cult like the Watchtower there is always the danger that they will at some point want to return to it. I see a lot of good advice here but to me it boils down to this. He has to make a decision to be himself or pretend to be someone he is not in order to please his family.
He also has to decide between his family and you. It is natural for someone to want to have a good relationship with their family but if in order to have that relationship with them they have to go through life acting out the role of good little JW it just isn't worth it. At least to me. To me it is bad enough to have to hide what you really believe and lie about it to please someone but with JWs it much worse than than that. Faking being a JW involves an entire lifestyle of deception. Going to meetings to listen to crap you don't believe in. Having make postive comments about crap you don't believe in. Going to your neighbors doors peddling crap you don't believe. If you have children you have to teach crap you don't believe in or make good little liars out of them so they don't give the game you are playing away.
If he decides to return to the Watchtower to please his family this is the game he is getting involve in and this is the game you are being sucked into. He has to decide if this is the kind of person he is and if it is worth it to him and you have to decide the same thing.
I know this sounds harsh but you are dealing with a harsh religion that makes harsh rules.
My heart goes out to you.